I'm not sure what it is about exhausting nights of light and broken sleep that make me want to blog. Baby girl had a small, dry cough all night and periodically would wake up groaning for me. I can tell you that Little Remedies Honey Elixer works wonders for those little coughs. So today will be a lazy day inside the house in our pajamas, building towers with giant blocks, reading books, cuddling and watching cartoons….. oh darn ;)
So growing up I remember my mom saying certain things and having certain "rules" that I never really thought anything of at the time. I just accepted it as how it was... I wasn't a difficult kid (only a difficult teen) Well now that I'm a mother myself from time to time I will say something to H and one of those "rules" will pop into my head and it dawns on me! This blog is all about me saying to my mom "I get it now, Mama. I completely get it."
Kitchen is closed after dinner.
After dishes were cleaned and everything put away there was to be no more access to the kitchen for the rest of the night. I totally get it now, Mom! Kids are NEVER done eating! My daughter can fill her belly full of all sorts of goodness and tell me she is done and then run straight over to the pantry and open the door asking for something else… and she's only 1-1/2! I can't imagine having a teenager and two little ones doing it. And after all that work to clean up I'd be ticked if I went back in the kitchen and saw another dirty dish in the sink. I remember going into the kitchen to get a "snack" before bedtime, open the refrigerator door and hear "KITCHEN'S CLOSED!!!" all the way from the other room…. now I get why she had that door installed to the kitchen. I always wondered why Dad never fixed that "creek" it made when it opened ;)
Hyper? Go run around the house a couple times.
I was dumb enough to actually do this when she told me to. I can just imagine what the neighbors thought. But again… I get it, Mom.
Bored? Want ME to give you something to do?
Ha! My thoughts exactly.
Go play outside.
Amen to this. Most of the time she didn't have to tell me twice to go play outside. I lived outside from the time the sun came up until it went down (with the exception of lunch and dinner) My sister was the TV and video gamer though. She had to be told a lot to go outside. It stinks that the world has changed so much in the past 15 years that it's sketchy to even let your kids to walk to the mailbox without worrying they'll get abducted. I'm getting a small taste of this now that Hayden likes to go play in her room, which is upstairs. Sometimes while I'm cleaning, she will head up there and shut her door. I turn on her baby monitor just to make sure she doesn't get into anything but I have her room pretty well baby-proofed. It's a nice little break for me and it's good for her to have that independence.
Let's play the quiet game.
I know exactly why my mom wanted us to play this game all the time. It was always in car rides and I was a very early talker, just like my H. Riding in the car now with H it all makes sense. I'm so proud that she has such a crazy vocabulary and can speak so clearly but, man, my child never shuts up! It's "Mommy, do you see the ___? Did you see the ___ mommy?? Weren't they beautiful? Those were great ___'s mom! Mommy sing Dora! Dora, Dora, Dora the Expuller!" Don't get me wrong. It's super cute and I'm very proud BUT there are times when it's constant and I just want a moment of silence. And that's where the "Quiet Game" comes in. My poor parents… I never won that game. I'm surprised my husband doesn't have H and I play this game on our car rides. He now has me talking nonstop and then a smaller version of me talking nonstop. hahaha
I know this is only the beginning of a lot of stuff for us because H is not even 2 yet and she has yet to let us off of this crazy roller coaster ride of toddlerhood.
Must be This Insane to ride. ;)
1st cup of coffee down and heading in there for my second. Who's with me?
xoxo,
Sleepless in Los Angeles
Tuesday, December 10, 2013
Wednesday, December 4, 2013
It's All About Principles.
My husband and I have been battling the "Terrible Two's" since right after H turned 1 last March. Or so we thought... Her actions and behavior goes in waves. Just like her teething (which she is completely DONE with!! WOOHOO!!) Our daughter is unbelievably smart and sweet but she is still a child. As she grows she is constantly learning and if there is one thing that helps me to deal with handling her in these tough times it's reminding myself that how I react to her bad behavior will help to shape her as she gets older.
I have had to seek out advice from close friends of mine, read articles online, and pray to God for patience and guidance in dealing with H. This is all new to me too.
What has been the hardest to deal with, I think, is the stubborn repetition of disobedience. I can scold her time after time to not throw her food down on the floor but she keeps doing it. A lot of times I don't have the energy to keep scolding her so I just give up and that's not what I need to do if I ever want it to get better.
One thing you should know about me is that I do believe in spankings. If time-out works for you, that's ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL but 9 times out of 10 it does not work for us.
A lot of the things I have to get on to her for are not even huge deals but they are PRINCIPLES. I'll be at the playground and H will do something to a kid and I will tell her to say her sorry or something and the parent will say "It's okay! I think he was doing such & such..." I always tell them "I know but it's a principle."
But I can be so lazy with punishment because it does take work. Bad behavior comes so naturally to kids. It is exhausting teaching good behavior but it has to be done. There are certain rules that I am pretty adamant about here in our house when it comes to our daughter.
We eat at the table.
We eat what is in front of you.
You may get down when Mommy & Daddy say you can get down.
We say "Excuse me", "Thank You", "Ma'am", "Sir", and "Please"
You obey Mommy & Daddy the FIRST time we tell you something.
You may not pitch a fit if you don't like something.
You listen when Mommy & Daddy are talking to you.
Good manners in public are a MUST.
You look people in the eyes when they're talking to you.
We share.
We are polite and kind to others.
We love the Lord and We obey His commandments.
Now call me southern or old-fashioned if you want but I bet if some of these things would've been enforced more we wouldn't be seeing so much of Miss Miley Cyrus! And It doesn't matter how lazy I get at times there is nothing that could cause me to scratch one of these rules off my list. I have to remind myself that how I teach our daughter here at home will reflect how she acts in public and how she acts once she is no longer under my wing 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
It's no easy task. I just keep hoping all my efforts will pay off one day :)
xoxo,
Exhausted in Los Angeles
I have had to seek out advice from close friends of mine, read articles online, and pray to God for patience and guidance in dealing with H. This is all new to me too.
What has been the hardest to deal with, I think, is the stubborn repetition of disobedience. I can scold her time after time to not throw her food down on the floor but she keeps doing it. A lot of times I don't have the energy to keep scolding her so I just give up and that's not what I need to do if I ever want it to get better.
One thing you should know about me is that I do believe in spankings. If time-out works for you, that's ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL but 9 times out of 10 it does not work for us.
A lot of the things I have to get on to her for are not even huge deals but they are PRINCIPLES. I'll be at the playground and H will do something to a kid and I will tell her to say her sorry or something and the parent will say "It's okay! I think he was doing such & such..." I always tell them "I know but it's a principle."
But I can be so lazy with punishment because it does take work. Bad behavior comes so naturally to kids. It is exhausting teaching good behavior but it has to be done. There are certain rules that I am pretty adamant about here in our house when it comes to our daughter.
We eat at the table.
We eat what is in front of you.
You may get down when Mommy & Daddy say you can get down.
We say "Excuse me", "Thank You", "Ma'am", "Sir", and "Please"
You obey Mommy & Daddy the FIRST time we tell you something.
You may not pitch a fit if you don't like something.
You listen when Mommy & Daddy are talking to you.
Good manners in public are a MUST.
You look people in the eyes when they're talking to you.
We share.
We are polite and kind to others.
We love the Lord and We obey His commandments.
Now call me southern or old-fashioned if you want but I bet if some of these things would've been enforced more we wouldn't be seeing so much of Miss Miley Cyrus! And It doesn't matter how lazy I get at times there is nothing that could cause me to scratch one of these rules off my list. I have to remind myself that how I teach our daughter here at home will reflect how she acts in public and how she acts once she is no longer under my wing 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
It's no easy task. I just keep hoping all my efforts will pay off one day :)
xoxo,
Exhausted in Los Angeles
Wednesday, October 2, 2013
What kind of Christian am I? Matthew 10:33
Those of you who follow my blog may remember a few posts back that I had decided to turn my life around and get my life right with the Lord. I wanted a change inside. Ultimately because I don't want to go to Hell when Jesus comes back but also because I want to be a light in my family and a good role model for my daughter and because I know that any problem that I might face in my life HE is the only one who has the power to fix it. I could pray all day pointing fingers at others and praying for God to change them but what I came to realize is that the change had to start with ME.
I have found awesome relief in the power of prayer. I am involved in my women's bible study. I read the books and my Bible........ but that's all behind closed doors and around other fellow Christians. That's the easy part.
This morning I faced something that really made me question the Christian that I thought I was.
At around 8:30am this morning I parked my car outside the DMV and began walking up towards to line of 75+ people lined up around the building. As I'm walking I pass a man standing outside of the parking lot with a megaphone speaking obnoxiously loud and stern. As I'm thinking to myself "Great. Just what I need this early in the morning." I just knew he was one of those nuts standing on the street yelling at everyone that they're all going to HELL! But as I'm listening (trying NOT to) I hear him quoting the exact scripture that I believe in.
As I take my place in line I'm listening to what he is saying and as I look around I see that most everyone is watching him. We were all in the same boat. None of us super-happy to be waiting outside for the doors to the DMV to open. I hear him quoting verses from the Bible that are all too familiar to me because I heard them for years every time the invitation was given at the end of the Church sermon. A young woman around my age walks up and takes her place in line behind me and she says "Oh great. Just what I need. Like it isn't bad enough having to be here this early." to which I reply "I know right! Dude, it's early! Isn't there somewhere else you can do that?" and then I hear him through the megaphone-- "The Bible says 'But whosoever shall deny me before men, him will I also deny before my Father which is in heaven. Do I have any born-again Christians here?" --I quickly thought about ignoring it but I couldn't. I partially raised my hand..... almost as if I was too ashamed for anyone else to see. And it was almost as if God knew my hesitation because then the man says "Just one woman?" referring to a lady a few steps in front of me. So I raised my hand all the way, looking down at the ground, chuckling to myself as if I was thinking "This is so stupid!" But I knew God was watching me the whole time and even though I did raise my hand he knows my heart and the hesitation.
Why?
I know the very truth that that man on the street was preaching. So why would I act like those standing around me as if he were some crazy lunatic? The Bible says to 'Go into all the world and teach my gospel.' Now, that doesn't mean that I should go buy a megaphone and stand on a street corner shouting scripture at strangers. But why wouldn't I have used that as an opportunity to turn to that young lady behind me and say to her "You know, what he is saying is true."
I wish I had the fire under me that that man has.
As soon as I was back in my car I cried and prayed to the Lord to forgive me for denying that I was a believer. Because that little bit of hesitation right before I halfway raised my hand? That was denial.
Let me not be that Christian, Lord. It's not easy so I pray for strength and ask for forgiveness for my foolish ways. It's a scary world we live in. Someone could walk right up to me, put a gun to my head and ask "Are you a Christian?".... what would I say?
It's just like my dad always said to me "I brought you into this world, I can take you out!" He was joking.... I think.... nevertheless there's truth in that coming from God and if any of you have had the chance to really read from the book of Revelation you'll agree with me when I say I'm pretty sure I do NOT want to go there... If any of my friends find that you're going through a tough time and really need some guidance or relief give it up to God. Really humble yourself and start to pray and ask him to work in your life. It really does help. I'm not perfect (FAAAAAAR FAR FAR from perfect) and I'm nowhere near the Christian that I want to be but I have seen changes since I have begun to pray for my life and I can honestly say that it works.
xoxo,
Sleepless in Los Angeles
I have found awesome relief in the power of prayer. I am involved in my women's bible study. I read the books and my Bible........ but that's all behind closed doors and around other fellow Christians. That's the easy part.
This morning I faced something that really made me question the Christian that I thought I was.
At around 8:30am this morning I parked my car outside the DMV and began walking up towards to line of 75+ people lined up around the building. As I'm walking I pass a man standing outside of the parking lot with a megaphone speaking obnoxiously loud and stern. As I'm thinking to myself "Great. Just what I need this early in the morning." I just knew he was one of those nuts standing on the street yelling at everyone that they're all going to HELL! But as I'm listening (trying NOT to) I hear him quoting the exact scripture that I believe in.
As I take my place in line I'm listening to what he is saying and as I look around I see that most everyone is watching him. We were all in the same boat. None of us super-happy to be waiting outside for the doors to the DMV to open. I hear him quoting verses from the Bible that are all too familiar to me because I heard them for years every time the invitation was given at the end of the Church sermon. A young woman around my age walks up and takes her place in line behind me and she says "Oh great. Just what I need. Like it isn't bad enough having to be here this early." to which I reply "I know right! Dude, it's early! Isn't there somewhere else you can do that?" and then I hear him through the megaphone-- "The Bible says 'But whosoever shall deny me before men, him will I also deny before my Father which is in heaven. Do I have any born-again Christians here?" --I quickly thought about ignoring it but I couldn't. I partially raised my hand..... almost as if I was too ashamed for anyone else to see. And it was almost as if God knew my hesitation because then the man says "Just one woman?" referring to a lady a few steps in front of me. So I raised my hand all the way, looking down at the ground, chuckling to myself as if I was thinking "This is so stupid!" But I knew God was watching me the whole time and even though I did raise my hand he knows my heart and the hesitation.
Why?
I know the very truth that that man on the street was preaching. So why would I act like those standing around me as if he were some crazy lunatic? The Bible says to 'Go into all the world and teach my gospel.' Now, that doesn't mean that I should go buy a megaphone and stand on a street corner shouting scripture at strangers. But why wouldn't I have used that as an opportunity to turn to that young lady behind me and say to her "You know, what he is saying is true."
I wish I had the fire under me that that man has.
As soon as I was back in my car I cried and prayed to the Lord to forgive me for denying that I was a believer. Because that little bit of hesitation right before I halfway raised my hand? That was denial.
Let me not be that Christian, Lord. It's not easy so I pray for strength and ask for forgiveness for my foolish ways. It's a scary world we live in. Someone could walk right up to me, put a gun to my head and ask "Are you a Christian?".... what would I say?
It's just like my dad always said to me "I brought you into this world, I can take you out!" He was joking.... I think.... nevertheless there's truth in that coming from God and if any of you have had the chance to really read from the book of Revelation you'll agree with me when I say I'm pretty sure I do NOT want to go there... If any of my friends find that you're going through a tough time and really need some guidance or relief give it up to God. Really humble yourself and start to pray and ask him to work in your life. It really does help. I'm not perfect (FAAAAAAR FAR FAR from perfect) and I'm nowhere near the Christian that I want to be but I have seen changes since I have begun to pray for my life and I can honestly say that it works.
xoxo,
Sleepless in Los Angeles
Tuesday, September 24, 2013
Catching Up / All Aboard the Potty Train
Ugh. I feel terrible. I have completely neglected my blog and it got to the point where I was avoiding it like it was a friend to whom I owed money.... haha
Since my last post in July a couple big things occured. I went on another week-long venture with H across country (via airplane) to visit family and when we got back I weaned her from breastfeeding. We have been completely nurse-free for two weeks as of yesterday. She does still ask for it from time to time if something brings it to mind but she doesn't pitch a fit when I tell her "Nope! All gone!" :) I'll be honest I do sort of miss it.. mostly for the bonding.. but now we just bond in other ways and she is way more cuddly at bedtime now and it's really sweet. And it's nice having my boobs back!!
Now on to more recent news!--
The past few nights I begun incorporating "potty time" into our bedtime routine. I realize that Hayden is just shy of being 19 months old and many people don't begin training until the child turns 2 years old but I decided it can't hurt to get her used to sitting and relaxing and realizing what it feels like to "have to go." She already refers to it as the "big girl potty" which I think is a good way for me to get H to transition. That's how I explained to her that she needed to throw her pacifiers away too. Kids have role models for a reason. They want to be like them. So it helps to know that's what their older role models do... that's just my opinion though.
Back to our new "potty time." A few months ago we had an incident in the bathtub where H stood up and said "Uh oh! Poopy!" So I quickly took her out and put her on the "big girl potty" and she went. I was so proud that she was able to catch herself and knew what it felt like. That spoke a lot to me. Hence why I decided now was a good time to begin somewhat potty-training her.
I am very much a routine & schedule-type mother. I think it's important and I find it has helped me in many ways. Schedules are not for everyone but they're definitely for me. That is how I got H to stop crying at naptime and bedtime. Same goes for this potty training. I know that going to the bathroom is not a scheduled thing but if I can just begin adding more and more "potty times" throughout the day then she will catch on and then begin telling ME when she needs to go to the potty. Again, I've never done this so I'm not doubting that it is a very, very-- I've heard some say the most--difficult time.
I have added these new "potty times" just before I put her in a clean diaper and PJ's for bed. When she is in the bath I dry her off and then place her on the potty. I have a small stack of books she chooses from and then I say "Sit on the potty like a big girl and read your book. Try to go pee pee. Mommy will be right back." Then I leave. I come back after like 30 seconds and check on her. Sometimes she wants to stay and read her book and other times she'll say "All done." The first few times I did this she was scared to death to be on the potty and would instantly say "All done, all done, all done!" I made her sit there for a few seconds, let her wipe (even though she never did anything) and flush. This week she has finally started enjoying it. So much so that tonight she actually went #2 while she read on the potty and I layed out her PJ's and straightened up in her room. She called to me "All done!" You talk about one proud mommy!!!
Next week or the week after I will add a morning potty time. From bed to potty then into a clean diaper. We'll see how it goes but the way I look at it is that it definitely can't hurt.
Parenthood is a fun, exhausting, challenging, rewarding journey. Let's do this!
xoxo,
Pooped in Los Angeles
(^^^ I thought that was fitting for this post ;)
Tuesday, July 2, 2013
Operation "Bye-Bye, Paci" Complete
So yesterday marked the one-week anniversary of my daughter and I throwing away her pacifiers. This was the second time we had done this. The first time was right after she turned one year old and I just removed the basket where I kept them in her room. She instantly noticed at naptime and the crying began. For three days naps were obsolete and would wake up numerous times at night crying. On the third night, after trying for two hours to let her cry it out and consoling her every 10-15 minutes, I caved and gave it back to her. The next morning she had a new tooth. I'm pretty sure that had a lot to do with it. Nevertheless, I figured she wasn't ready and neither was I.
Today she turns 16 months old and has not cried once since we threw them away last Monday. I'm so proud of her. This time I wanted to do things differently and while the only way to really wean them is to take them away cold turkey, I let her be a part of it.
For months I have had her say "Bye Bye" to her paci's first thing when she woke up in the morning and after her naps. Soon I didn't even have to tell her and she just would walk over, say "Bye Bye BC" (that's what she called them) and put them in her basket. So the morning that I had planned on getting rid of them, I called her into the room next to the trash can and gave her all three and explained that it was time to say "Bye Bye BC's" because she was a big girl now and she didn't need them. I could look in her eyes and see she knew what I was saying. She was extremely hesitant and after a lot of coaxing and explaining, she put them in the trash can and then I gave her a hug and a high-five and she leaned in and said "KISS" Hahaha
And that was the end of that! The only thing that happened was for the next couple days she talked in her crib for at least an hour before falling asleep. But, hey, that's better than crying! She has maybe asked for it four times at random, but I change the subject and move on.
Getting rid of the pacifier was something that I had been dreading since the day I gave it back to her. But I did it and it was fantastic, but it's not like that for everyone obviously. I think if you're wanting to wean your child, try what I did and begin the process early by teaching them to just have it during sleep times and keep it like that for a few weeks or months until you set a date in your mind that you're going to get rid of them and then stick to it. Maybe it helped that I let my daughter be the one to throw them away and personally say bye herself. I really think so.
You wanna know the easiest way to wean a child from the pacifier? Never give them one to begin with!! Hahahaha
Since last monday, I have put a halt on weaning from breastfeeding. I didn't want to tackle both and the pacifier was more important to me. We were down to just the one feeding before bedtime but I've let her nurse before nap and bed now just to give her that fixation that seemed to calm her when she had her pacifier. I'll get back on weaning this week. One step at a time, mamas!!
xoxo,
Rested in Los Angeles
Today she turns 16 months old and has not cried once since we threw them away last Monday. I'm so proud of her. This time I wanted to do things differently and while the only way to really wean them is to take them away cold turkey, I let her be a part of it.
For months I have had her say "Bye Bye" to her paci's first thing when she woke up in the morning and after her naps. Soon I didn't even have to tell her and she just would walk over, say "Bye Bye BC" (that's what she called them) and put them in her basket. So the morning that I had planned on getting rid of them, I called her into the room next to the trash can and gave her all three and explained that it was time to say "Bye Bye BC's" because she was a big girl now and she didn't need them. I could look in her eyes and see she knew what I was saying. She was extremely hesitant and after a lot of coaxing and explaining, she put them in the trash can and then I gave her a hug and a high-five and she leaned in and said "KISS" Hahaha
And that was the end of that! The only thing that happened was for the next couple days she talked in her crib for at least an hour before falling asleep. But, hey, that's better than crying! She has maybe asked for it four times at random, but I change the subject and move on.
Getting rid of the pacifier was something that I had been dreading since the day I gave it back to her. But I did it and it was fantastic, but it's not like that for everyone obviously. I think if you're wanting to wean your child, try what I did and begin the process early by teaching them to just have it during sleep times and keep it like that for a few weeks or months until you set a date in your mind that you're going to get rid of them and then stick to it. Maybe it helped that I let my daughter be the one to throw them away and personally say bye herself. I really think so.
You wanna know the easiest way to wean a child from the pacifier? Never give them one to begin with!! Hahahaha
Since last monday, I have put a halt on weaning from breastfeeding. I didn't want to tackle both and the pacifier was more important to me. We were down to just the one feeding before bedtime but I've let her nurse before nap and bed now just to give her that fixation that seemed to calm her when she had her pacifier. I'll get back on weaning this week. One step at a time, mamas!!
xoxo,
Rested in Los Angeles
Monday, June 24, 2013
The Suckiest Wife of the Year Award goes to......
So, my husband is probably cursing my name during his entire ride in to work this morning and I feel terrible about it. I took the car yesterday evening and didn't put gas in it and.... it's on E. I completely forgot to tell him until this morning when he was walking out the door.... late. I also kinda took the weekend off this weekend a.k.a. I did as little mommy/wifey-work as possible. So he had no breakfast burrito this morning to eat on the way because I didn't make them. Why? Because they take a good 3 hours to cook everything, assemble them, and wrap them up to freeze.
I have these days from time to time. You know, the kind where it feels like nothing you do is right. I suppose I should've came home and grabbed his debit card, loaded up the baby back into the car, and gone to get gas... My intention was to go put gas in the car when the baby went to bed. And I obviously forgot.
I'm extremely forgetful and it sucks. It has gotten so much worse since our daughter was born too. I get so irritated because I lose the dumbest things! It's even worse when other people are involved. Most of the time it's my husband.
So enough of the pity-party. Since he left for work this morning hating my guts I have to step it up today to make it up to him. Overall, I think I'm a darn good wife though. I don't know many women who wake up every morning and make their husband's breakfast and lunch for the day. In fact, not too long ago I was involved in a post on Facebook where women were actually talking about how their husbands should make the coffee for them before they left for work so that they could sleep in and it would be ready when they got up. I couldn't believe it! Reading their comments I was thinking to myself "I can't imagine the look on my husband's face if I asked him to make me a pot of coffee so I didn't have to get out of bed..." Come on, ladies.
I hate that this morning happened the way it did and I know it's going to put my hubby in a terrible mood at work and it's all my fault. I seriously hate that. But what's done is done and I just need to not let it happen again.... like.. ever.
xoxo,
Guilty in Los Angeles
I have these days from time to time. You know, the kind where it feels like nothing you do is right. I suppose I should've came home and grabbed his debit card, loaded up the baby back into the car, and gone to get gas... My intention was to go put gas in the car when the baby went to bed. And I obviously forgot.
I'm extremely forgetful and it sucks. It has gotten so much worse since our daughter was born too. I get so irritated because I lose the dumbest things! It's even worse when other people are involved. Most of the time it's my husband.
So enough of the pity-party. Since he left for work this morning hating my guts I have to step it up today to make it up to him. Overall, I think I'm a darn good wife though. I don't know many women who wake up every morning and make their husband's breakfast and lunch for the day. In fact, not too long ago I was involved in a post on Facebook where women were actually talking about how their husbands should make the coffee for them before they left for work so that they could sleep in and it would be ready when they got up. I couldn't believe it! Reading their comments I was thinking to myself "I can't imagine the look on my husband's face if I asked him to make me a pot of coffee so I didn't have to get out of bed..." Come on, ladies.
I hate that this morning happened the way it did and I know it's going to put my hubby in a terrible mood at work and it's all my fault. I seriously hate that. But what's done is done and I just need to not let it happen again.... like.. ever.
xoxo,
Guilty in Los Angeles
Monday, June 3, 2013
Society vs Popcorn
One of the things that kept me sane through pregnancy, newbornhood, the whole first year was reading. When I was pregnant, I loved reading about what was going on with this little being growing inside of me.. It helped me know "What to Expect." Reading about breastfeeding definitely helped and also about baby's sleep habits once she made her appearance. It just calmed my nerves to know... call it a control thing? I don't know.
Reading had it's ups and it's downs. I remember numerous times my mom would say to me "STOP READING SO MUCH!!" and when she was a newborn I was venting to her and my mom said "She's not by the book. Listen to HER!" And it's true. While reading helped me in so many ways it did not always prove to be 100% on course. It was all so new to me and, sure, it would've been so nice to have flipped to a page to find out why my child was crying, that's just not how it works.
It helped me to expect that around 8-9 months, my daughter would start to experience separation anxiety at night... and that was so true. It helped me to understand that around 4 or 5 months, she may go through "nursing strikes" and she did. That from birth she would go through an insane amount of growth spurts within those first 3 months and what to expect during those.
What reading also did to me was make me somewhat paranoid about things. Don't do this or baby might do this. Don't feed your baby this or they might do THIS! Your baby's bed is to be nothing but a slab of rock or else they might die of comfort! Don't let your newborn cry or else she'll grow up thinking no one in this world loves her and that's how the Charles Manson's are born!
DD is now 15 months old and what I have had to realize is that I'm the parent. I know my daughter better than the back of my hand.. I know her like the muscles and tissues and nerves and bones inside the back of my hand.
I may have put a little extra padding inside her bassinet (not much, but just a little), and put a folded blanket under her crib sheet for a little cushion when I moved her to her crib. We used crib bumpers. When she got old enough to turn over both sides I put little stuffed animals and lovey's in her crib as well as a baby blanket. I let her cry. I feed her hot dogs. And popcorn.
I get the possibility of what COULD go wrong. However, I know my child. I don't just give her a whole hot dog and bowl of popcorn and leave the room. But, she is human and let's face it... those things are staples in America and if I can't give her a hot dog and some popcorn then I am denying her the freedom on which this country was build *cue patriotic anthem* My four fathers once said..... wait... four fathers or forefathers? Hmmm.....
Anyways, I sometimes have to remind myself that it's okay to let her enjoy the good things in life. In moderation. And with supervision. She knows that she has to drink lots of water while eating her popcorn. One good sip every couple bites in case one of the little hulls gets stuck in her throat.
I constantly have to block out some of the stuff society says about what to do with your kids. It will drive you slap crazy if you let it!
Educate yourselves, but know your kids :)
xoxo,
Sleepless in Los Angeles
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
At War with Toddlerhood
Wow it has been forever since I have posted. I really want to make it a habit to write once a week since I do really enjoy it. Want to know the reason why I have been terrible at blogging so far? The computer screen makes me SLEEPY! I already have to sit down to edit the pictures from my photography sessions and after about an hour of doing that, my eyes need a rest. I honestly don't know how I got through some of those 20-hour days working at the newspaper in Georgia all those years. It's just cray-cray! (I am not allowed to say that in real life because the hubby hates it but I can here because IT'S MY BLOG!!! lol)
So, my daughter is just a few days shy of being 15 months old and it is almost like toddlerhood has slapped me right in the face... hard. Now, she has never been an easy child from day 1, so her fussiness, mood swings, clingyness, and tantrums are nothing new to me. The only thing that has changed has been the way I am, for lack of a better word, "allowed" to handle it. I only say that because obviously you are going to handle things differently depending on what age your child is. At her age we use time-out and little pops on the hand. I am not opposed to spankings. However, at this age I don't feel they are really necessary when I get my point across in other ways. Plus, we give her "love spanks" all the time so for her to tell a difference in those and an actual spanking we would have to pop her very hard and I can't bring myself to do that just yet.
I will tell you this. Friends.... if time-out or whatever other anti-spanking disciplinary tool you use with your child ain't workin.... please, please, please change it!! Perhaps your child needs something stronger. Uuuuuugh I cannot staaaaand people who don't discipline their kids!! If at any point you feel like your kid is running YOU, then you're not doing your job as a parent.
Don't get me wrong, I am a sucker at times when I am just over H's little attitude and I just give in to whatever the heck she is flipping out about. Most of the time it's when we are in public or when I am trying to get something done. But at H's age, I believe she is trying to just find her place in this family and so teaching her to know who is boss and that the world doesn't revolve solely around her is priority. As parents, we have a small window of opportunity to teach this and if it isn't successful then what we are stuck with is a child-centered life. Sure your child is the center of your entire world and existence in your heart, but isn't teaching them to respect and the right and wrong ways to handle things much more important? I like what I read in "Becoming BabyWise" when he said that becoming our child's friend is the reward we will get in the end.
There are a handful of bad habits I am trying to break my daughter from right now. A few months ago she started slapping at something if she did not want it (i.e. her juice cup being offered to her, a toy being given to her, etc.) Now she has started saying "No." when she doesn't want something. I am trying to get her to say "No, THANK YOU." Because she can say "Thank you" ("Dee-doo!") and she knows what it means. Another is patience. Oh, Lord, this one is a pain in my rear. There is simply no easy way to teach a kid patience, but I just say it over and over to H and hope that she will eventually get the hang of it. We all have to do it and we don't like it all the time, but it is something we have to have. If I'm sick of sitting in traffic for two hours, I'm not allowed to just get up and walk around the car, so I have to wait and so does she! lol. That sounds so stupid, but it's the truth.
Another that has just recently been made crystal clear to me is that the ability to take my daughter out to a restaurant has become pretty much obsolete. Now that she can walk she wants her freedom 100% and unfortunately when you're in a public setting where people are sitting around you enjoying themselves it is tough to just say "No. You have to be PATIENT!" and let them fuss and squirm and pitch a tantrum. So most of the time we give in to get her to stop. That is a toughie because other people are involved.
What has been made clear to me is that it doesn't matter how wonderful and amazing and smart your kid is they all go through these stages. The only difference is the way we, the parents, handle it. And unfortunately that is what shapes our children as they grow from being toddlers to preteens.... scary, huh?
Coffee cup is now empty and I hear my little angel-muffin awake in her room! Time to tackle another day, friends! Let's do it!
xoxo,
Sleepless in Los Angeles
So, my daughter is just a few days shy of being 15 months old and it is almost like toddlerhood has slapped me right in the face... hard. Now, she has never been an easy child from day 1, so her fussiness, mood swings, clingyness, and tantrums are nothing new to me. The only thing that has changed has been the way I am, for lack of a better word, "allowed" to handle it. I only say that because obviously you are going to handle things differently depending on what age your child is. At her age we use time-out and little pops on the hand. I am not opposed to spankings. However, at this age I don't feel they are really necessary when I get my point across in other ways. Plus, we give her "love spanks" all the time so for her to tell a difference in those and an actual spanking we would have to pop her very hard and I can't bring myself to do that just yet.
I will tell you this. Friends.... if time-out or whatever other anti-spanking disciplinary tool you use with your child ain't workin.... please, please, please change it!! Perhaps your child needs something stronger. Uuuuuugh I cannot staaaaand people who don't discipline their kids!! If at any point you feel like your kid is running YOU, then you're not doing your job as a parent.
Don't get me wrong, I am a sucker at times when I am just over H's little attitude and I just give in to whatever the heck she is flipping out about. Most of the time it's when we are in public or when I am trying to get something done. But at H's age, I believe she is trying to just find her place in this family and so teaching her to know who is boss and that the world doesn't revolve solely around her is priority. As parents, we have a small window of opportunity to teach this and if it isn't successful then what we are stuck with is a child-centered life. Sure your child is the center of your entire world and existence in your heart, but isn't teaching them to respect and the right and wrong ways to handle things much more important? I like what I read in "Becoming BabyWise" when he said that becoming our child's friend is the reward we will get in the end.
There are a handful of bad habits I am trying to break my daughter from right now. A few months ago she started slapping at something if she did not want it (i.e. her juice cup being offered to her, a toy being given to her, etc.) Now she has started saying "No." when she doesn't want something. I am trying to get her to say "No, THANK YOU." Because she can say "Thank you" ("Dee-doo!") and she knows what it means. Another is patience. Oh, Lord, this one is a pain in my rear. There is simply no easy way to teach a kid patience, but I just say it over and over to H and hope that she will eventually get the hang of it. We all have to do it and we don't like it all the time, but it is something we have to have. If I'm sick of sitting in traffic for two hours, I'm not allowed to just get up and walk around the car, so I have to wait and so does she! lol. That sounds so stupid, but it's the truth.
Another that has just recently been made crystal clear to me is that the ability to take my daughter out to a restaurant has become pretty much obsolete. Now that she can walk she wants her freedom 100% and unfortunately when you're in a public setting where people are sitting around you enjoying themselves it is tough to just say "No. You have to be PATIENT!" and let them fuss and squirm and pitch a tantrum. So most of the time we give in to get her to stop. That is a toughie because other people are involved.
What has been made clear to me is that it doesn't matter how wonderful and amazing and smart your kid is they all go through these stages. The only difference is the way we, the parents, handle it. And unfortunately that is what shapes our children as they grow from being toddlers to preteens.... scary, huh?
Coffee cup is now empty and I hear my little angel-muffin awake in her room! Time to tackle another day, friends! Let's do it!
xoxo,
Sleepless in Los Angeles
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
Keep Calm & Latch On
People often come up to me on the street asking "Natasha, you're still breastfeeding? How do you do it?" No they don't. I just get a kick out of opening like that.
But to answer the big question here, YES, I am still nursing my daughter that just turned one and YES, I wanted her to be completely weaned when she turned one. However, any of you who have BFed your child until they self-weaned understand that that is not something you can just stop completely. It's not a pacifier. You can't just take it away. There are BIG consequences for doing that with breastfeeding. It can cause depression and anxiety in both the child and yourself. The child's appetite will not be matured enough to be gaining the nutrients from table food that he/she needs on a daily basis.
Here is how I look at it: My daughter just turned 13 months and she is NOT putting me out any by still nursing when she wakes up in the morning and before naps and bedtime. I also nurse during the night if she wakes up and I can tell that's what she wants. THAT IS OKAY.
My daughter has been sick twice in the past 2 weeks. My husband had a horrible stomach bug for a few days and thank GOD she did not catch that. Then I started to get a cold but it went away quickly. Back to what I was saying, she has been sick. When babies are sick it is tough. However the increased clingyness and love can be very nice :) For my daughter she has many bouts of pure-out sweetness, snotty-nose kisses, hugs, and just wanting to chill and watch TV on mommy or daddy's lap. But then once drowsiness sets in she is not a happy camper. This week she had a sore throat and every time she would cough she'd cry afterwards. It broke my heart! She hardly ate anything but some applesauce and snacks here and there. I nurse her more when she is sick. Even now. Not hardly as much as when she was an infant, but I know when that is what she is wanting. Sometimes that is just all she wants.
Did you know that your breastmilk actually changes to meet the needs of your growing child? For example, since we are in the weaning process and are down to 2-3 nursings a day, levels in certain antibodies actually increases. One common misconception about nursing as your child gets older is that everything decreases and it's not true! It really is the perfect food! That is one of the major beauties of these wonderful things God created called BOOOOOBS! Go on and say it out loud. You know you want to.
I am a huge advocate for breastfeeding and I haven't always been. When I was 5 months pregnant, my aunt asked me if I planned on breastfeeding or formula-feeding and I told her I wasn't sure. Her response? "You breastfeed that baby." LOL!! Aunt Denise, I'm talking about YOU! I'm sure my mom or whoever would've said the same thing had it come up, but it just simply hadn't crossed my mind! I wasn't around many babies as a child... at all, actually. I was only 10 when my nephew was born. So it was something I hadn't really considered.
Then I downloaded the book "The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding" written by seven members of the La Leche League, I believe seven is correct. That book is wonderful and I highly recommend reading it if you're pregnant or even just have a newborn! It is a wonderful book and very informative because, to be honest, I was scared! I had no idea what to expect and I knew absolutely nothing about how my body would actually produce the stuff!
There is so much I didn't know. I think that if more women actually knew more facts about breastfeeding other than just "Won't my boobs be ruined?" WHO CARES!!! Time is gonna take care of that anyways, honey!
Facts to ease your mind:
* Once you get the hang of it, breastfeeding is the easiest thing you can do.
* It is natural and why God created them, but it is NOT "JUST FOR HIPPIES". (This drives me NUTS!)
* It is the perfect food for your baby.
* It does not "tie you down" as I have been asked so. many. times. Don't allow yourself to be tied down by introducing a bottle early, but nursing from breast more so that there is no confusion. This allows daddy or whomever to feed the baby if you need to go somewhere. Keep plenty of milk on hand.
* Your boobs will not rot and fall off. They will be perfectly fine while you nurse and after you wean. Trust me, the man in your life won't turn you down for sex because you chose to nurse vs. bottle-feed your child. Once he learns enough about it, he'll be 100% for it (if that doesn't work, show him the formula aisle in the store and how much the stuff costs!)
* Want to lose the baby weight fast? Breastfeed.
You've heard breastfed babies have to eat more? They do. But not by much. This is because breastmilk is much more easily digested than formula. The average one-month old only nurses every 3 hours. You've heard formula-fed babies sleep all night? This is a myth and not a valid reason for choosing not to nurse. That's like saying "Let's just fill my belly full of whatever so I can get a full nights sleep." It's quality, not quantity. Your child will sleep all night when they are ready. There are methods you can try if you're adamant about them sleeping all night long at an early age, but babies don't always wake up out of hunger, just keep that in mind, too.
I do want to say that formula feeding your baby is fine. Your baby is getting food. Your baby will be happy and love you. I understand that many, many people choose formula due to either health reasons or because it's easier when you have to work. whatever the reason should be. But formula feeding is the norm in today's society. After I nursed my daughter for the first time after birth, I cracked and bled and wasn't able to nurse her again until I had let myself heal. The nurses were extremely rude to me in the hospital because they thought I just didn't want to.. My husband witnessed me actually crying because I felt like such a failure and that I wasn't going to be able to do it. Thank God for formula during that week and thank God for my mom who helped correct Hayden's latch. It was painful at first but we got it right and I had to grit my teeth and bear it for a while until my "girls" toughened up.
FACT: Only 60% of women breastfeed for the first 3 months, 20% breastfeed for 6 months, and only 15% after 6 months. It drops drastically past one year of age.
Now that I can tell my daughter has begun to wean herself, it saddens me a little. However, I know that once it's done I'll be glad. I decided against my original plan to try to wean her myself by one year, but after reading about it and realizing that she still needs it right now self-led weaning is the way to go. I would hate to force something on her that she isn't quite ready for yet. And like I said-- she is not putting me out any. I know that when we leave the house she will eat food-food and I don't have to worry about hiding out in the backseat of the car anymore to nurse her, but that when we get home if it is what she needs to settle down for bed than that's perfectly fine with me. Like everything it is very short-lived and I'll continue to enjoy the time of bonding while it lasts. :)
Keep calm & Latch on <3
xoxo,
Sleepless in Los Angeles
A couple great articles on breastfeeding:
The "Power Hour" -- About BFing within the first hour of baby's life. Good stuff right here!
Timeline of the Benefits of Breastfeeding
But to answer the big question here, YES, I am still nursing my daughter that just turned one and YES, I wanted her to be completely weaned when she turned one. However, any of you who have BFed your child until they self-weaned understand that that is not something you can just stop completely. It's not a pacifier. You can't just take it away. There are BIG consequences for doing that with breastfeeding. It can cause depression and anxiety in both the child and yourself. The child's appetite will not be matured enough to be gaining the nutrients from table food that he/she needs on a daily basis.
Here is how I look at it: My daughter just turned 13 months and she is NOT putting me out any by still nursing when she wakes up in the morning and before naps and bedtime. I also nurse during the night if she wakes up and I can tell that's what she wants. THAT IS OKAY.
My daughter has been sick twice in the past 2 weeks. My husband had a horrible stomach bug for a few days and thank GOD she did not catch that. Then I started to get a cold but it went away quickly. Back to what I was saying, she has been sick. When babies are sick it is tough. However the increased clingyness and love can be very nice :) For my daughter she has many bouts of pure-out sweetness, snotty-nose kisses, hugs, and just wanting to chill and watch TV on mommy or daddy's lap. But then once drowsiness sets in she is not a happy camper. This week she had a sore throat and every time she would cough she'd cry afterwards. It broke my heart! She hardly ate anything but some applesauce and snacks here and there. I nurse her more when she is sick. Even now. Not hardly as much as when she was an infant, but I know when that is what she is wanting. Sometimes that is just all she wants.
Did you know that your breastmilk actually changes to meet the needs of your growing child? For example, since we are in the weaning process and are down to 2-3 nursings a day, levels in certain antibodies actually increases. One common misconception about nursing as your child gets older is that everything decreases and it's not true! It really is the perfect food! That is one of the major beauties of these wonderful things God created called BOOOOOBS! Go on and say it out loud. You know you want to.
I am a huge advocate for breastfeeding and I haven't always been. When I was 5 months pregnant, my aunt asked me if I planned on breastfeeding or formula-feeding and I told her I wasn't sure. Her response? "You breastfeed that baby." LOL!! Aunt Denise, I'm talking about YOU! I'm sure my mom or whoever would've said the same thing had it come up, but it just simply hadn't crossed my mind! I wasn't around many babies as a child... at all, actually. I was only 10 when my nephew was born. So it was something I hadn't really considered.
Then I downloaded the book "The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding" written by seven members of the La Leche League, I believe seven is correct. That book is wonderful and I highly recommend reading it if you're pregnant or even just have a newborn! It is a wonderful book and very informative because, to be honest, I was scared! I had no idea what to expect and I knew absolutely nothing about how my body would actually produce the stuff!
There is so much I didn't know. I think that if more women actually knew more facts about breastfeeding other than just "Won't my boobs be ruined?" WHO CARES!!! Time is gonna take care of that anyways, honey!
Facts to ease your mind:
* Once you get the hang of it, breastfeeding is the easiest thing you can do.
* It is natural and why God created them, but it is NOT "JUST FOR HIPPIES". (This drives me NUTS!)
* It is the perfect food for your baby.
* It does not "tie you down" as I have been asked so. many. times. Don't allow yourself to be tied down by introducing a bottle early, but nursing from breast more so that there is no confusion. This allows daddy or whomever to feed the baby if you need to go somewhere. Keep plenty of milk on hand.
* Your boobs will not rot and fall off. They will be perfectly fine while you nurse and after you wean. Trust me, the man in your life won't turn you down for sex because you chose to nurse vs. bottle-feed your child. Once he learns enough about it, he'll be 100% for it (if that doesn't work, show him the formula aisle in the store and how much the stuff costs!)
* Want to lose the baby weight fast? Breastfeed.
You've heard breastfed babies have to eat more? They do. But not by much. This is because breastmilk is much more easily digested than formula. The average one-month old only nurses every 3 hours. You've heard formula-fed babies sleep all night? This is a myth and not a valid reason for choosing not to nurse. That's like saying "Let's just fill my belly full of whatever so I can get a full nights sleep." It's quality, not quantity. Your child will sleep all night when they are ready. There are methods you can try if you're adamant about them sleeping all night long at an early age, but babies don't always wake up out of hunger, just keep that in mind, too.
I do want to say that formula feeding your baby is fine. Your baby is getting food. Your baby will be happy and love you. I understand that many, many people choose formula due to either health reasons or because it's easier when you have to work. whatever the reason should be. But formula feeding is the norm in today's society. After I nursed my daughter for the first time after birth, I cracked and bled and wasn't able to nurse her again until I had let myself heal. The nurses were extremely rude to me in the hospital because they thought I just didn't want to.. My husband witnessed me actually crying because I felt like such a failure and that I wasn't going to be able to do it. Thank God for formula during that week and thank God for my mom who helped correct Hayden's latch. It was painful at first but we got it right and I had to grit my teeth and bear it for a while until my "girls" toughened up.
FACT: Only 60% of women breastfeed for the first 3 months, 20% breastfeed for 6 months, and only 15% after 6 months. It drops drastically past one year of age.
Now that I can tell my daughter has begun to wean herself, it saddens me a little. However, I know that once it's done I'll be glad. I decided against my original plan to try to wean her myself by one year, but after reading about it and realizing that she still needs it right now self-led weaning is the way to go. I would hate to force something on her that she isn't quite ready for yet. And like I said-- she is not putting me out any. I know that when we leave the house she will eat food-food and I don't have to worry about hiding out in the backseat of the car anymore to nurse her, but that when we get home if it is what she needs to settle down for bed than that's perfectly fine with me. Like everything it is very short-lived and I'll continue to enjoy the time of bonding while it lasts. :)
Keep calm & Latch on <3
xoxo,
Sleepless in Los Angeles
A couple great articles on breastfeeding:
The "Power Hour" -- About BFing within the first hour of baby's life. Good stuff right here!
Timeline of the Benefits of Breastfeeding
Thursday, March 28, 2013
Create in Me a Clean Heart
Until I got pregnant with my daughter in June of 2011, I had lived a very bad life. I'm not sure "bad" is even the right word. I think the right word would be "sinful." Don't get me wrong it was fun, but looking back I wish so many things would've been done differently. But isn't that something we all look back and think about some things? It's just part of life.
I drank.. a LOT.
I smoked.
I cursed like a sailor.
I got a DUI.
I did not wait until my first marriage to have sex.
I married and divorced someone God very clearly did not choose for me.
I lived with my current husband before we were married.
I chose to get pregnant out of wedlock.
I stayed away from the church out of pure rebellion and resentment.
I am no saint.
I took MY LIFE, which is not something I even deserved, and took it completely for granted.
I'm telling you all this just to say that I KNOW what I did in my past. There have been moments where I have been laying in bed and have a flashback of something I had done and I literally get sick to my stomach. I wish there were some way that I could completely erase it out of my brain because to think I was ever that person just kills me.
When I had my baby girl, my entire life changed. Actually, it changed when I found out I was having her. But until I actually HAD her and held her in my arms I knew that I wanted to be the best mother I could be. I want to also live a more Godly life so that she will see me as an example of how she should be and should want to be. Mind you, I grew up in church. Growing up, my family went every time the doors were open. That mixed with a couple of things that happened in my childhood, caused me to turn and rebel against Church once I was finally out of my parent's house.
I knew that I wanted to make a pretty big change when I met a few fellow stay-at-home moms here on base. I would say they are my best friends here. They are also very good role models of what a good, Christian friend, wife, and mother should be without being all in-your-face-quoting-scripture-24/7-overboard with it. But just being told "Sometimes you just have to pray about it and give it to Him." is exactly what I needed to hear. Even deciding to start living a better life, I don't plan to attend church every single Sunday. I would like to start going, though. My hubby has to work on Sundays a lot and so he takes the car. However, I have started attending the women's bible study here on my base every Tuesday. It is wonderful and my daughter gets to spend time with other kids in the nursery.
I am having some trouble letting go of the "You're not worthy" feeling while sitting there in Bible study. Like I have no right to sit there because of the life I used to live. I know I am surrounded by women who, at some point, probably did some of the same things. But it is tough when I am trying to live a better life because I WANT TO not because it looks good or because I think I'm better than anyone, but because I genuinely want to lead a good, Christian life and example for my family. I hate being blatantly reminded of how I used to live by those who know me. I think that is very wrong and not what I need in a "support system." When I mention that I have started going to a Bible study and being told "You're the biggest hypocrite of them all." is very painful because I KNOW, but I am trying to change.
I refuse to give up. One thing that was made clear in a book that I have just read is that it is a constant battle to live a Christian life. And I can attest to that. That's why I stayed away from the church all those years. It was just easier and "more fun" to party and sin without a care in the world. Not thinking that at any point I could have my life taken from me.
I want the past to stay in my past. I know I'm no Mother Teresa, but there is nothing wrong with someone wanting to start fresh and live a better life for their family.
And that is what I plan to do :)
"I ain't as good as I'm gonna get. But I'm better than I used to be." --Tim McGraw
xoxo,
Sleepless in Los Angeles
I drank.. a LOT.
I smoked.
I cursed like a sailor.
I got a DUI.
I did not wait until my first marriage to have sex.
I married and divorced someone God very clearly did not choose for me.
I lived with my current husband before we were married.
I chose to get pregnant out of wedlock.
I stayed away from the church out of pure rebellion and resentment.
I am no saint.
I took MY LIFE, which is not something I even deserved, and took it completely for granted.
I'm telling you all this just to say that I KNOW what I did in my past. There have been moments where I have been laying in bed and have a flashback of something I had done and I literally get sick to my stomach. I wish there were some way that I could completely erase it out of my brain because to think I was ever that person just kills me.
When I had my baby girl, my entire life changed. Actually, it changed when I found out I was having her. But until I actually HAD her and held her in my arms I knew that I wanted to be the best mother I could be. I want to also live a more Godly life so that she will see me as an example of how she should be and should want to be. Mind you, I grew up in church. Growing up, my family went every time the doors were open. That mixed with a couple of things that happened in my childhood, caused me to turn and rebel against Church once I was finally out of my parent's house.
I knew that I wanted to make a pretty big change when I met a few fellow stay-at-home moms here on base. I would say they are my best friends here. They are also very good role models of what a good, Christian friend, wife, and mother should be without being all in-your-face-quoting-scripture-24/7-overboard with it. But just being told "Sometimes you just have to pray about it and give it to Him." is exactly what I needed to hear. Even deciding to start living a better life, I don't plan to attend church every single Sunday. I would like to start going, though. My hubby has to work on Sundays a lot and so he takes the car. However, I have started attending the women's bible study here on my base every Tuesday. It is wonderful and my daughter gets to spend time with other kids in the nursery.
I am having some trouble letting go of the "You're not worthy" feeling while sitting there in Bible study. Like I have no right to sit there because of the life I used to live. I know I am surrounded by women who, at some point, probably did some of the same things. But it is tough when I am trying to live a better life because I WANT TO not because it looks good or because I think I'm better than anyone, but because I genuinely want to lead a good, Christian life and example for my family. I hate being blatantly reminded of how I used to live by those who know me. I think that is very wrong and not what I need in a "support system." When I mention that I have started going to a Bible study and being told "You're the biggest hypocrite of them all." is very painful because I KNOW, but I am trying to change.
I refuse to give up. One thing that was made clear in a book that I have just read is that it is a constant battle to live a Christian life. And I can attest to that. That's why I stayed away from the church all those years. It was just easier and "more fun" to party and sin without a care in the world. Not thinking that at any point I could have my life taken from me.
I want the past to stay in my past. I know I'm no Mother Teresa, but there is nothing wrong with someone wanting to start fresh and live a better life for their family.
And that is what I plan to do :)
"I ain't as good as I'm gonna get. But I'm better than I used to be." --Tim McGraw
xoxo,
Sleepless in Los Angeles
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
I just do not get it. {A petty girl blog}
I get legitimately pissed off when people who should NOT be so conceited are so conceited!! I cannot understand, for the life of me, why some people continue to take pictures of themselves and post them for all the world to see. I have honestly unfriended and unfollowed people because their constant pictures of their face irritate me. And please someone tell me what the deal is with people taking pictures of themselves SLEEPING?! Is that some strange thing like “sleep-walking”? I’ve never heard of “Sleep-taking pictures of myself”…
I know this is completely out of the norm as a topic of one of my blogs, but it is something that I have kept pent up inside of me and I needed to let this monster out!
I know for a FACT that I am not the most gorgeous girl in the whole world and, yes, if I’m feeling pretty at a certain moment in time I might post a “selfie” but dear Lord, those people… I just wonder if other people think that too or if that is just a part of me that really needs to find Jesus… or both? Hahaha
I feel better now. :)
xoxo,
Sleepless & Hormonal in Los Angeles
Food & Money-Saving Tips from a very busy (kinda lazy) SAHM
People always come up to me on the streets and ask “Natasha, you are so amazing! How do you do it?” Hahaha I’m just kidding. No one says that. But it was a great lead-in, right?
My idea of a stay-at-home mom was so completely different before I actually became one. I imagined my house would be spotless all the time, baby would be completely happy because she will have slept all night long, and dinner would be on the table when my husband walked in the door… back then the thought of having to “hurry up and shower before the baby wakes up” never crossed my mind because I would just be showered and gorgeous all the time! lol
One of the things I have always enjoyed has been cooking. I enjoy cooking, feeding people who enjoy my cooking, and eating. Unfortunately, some things change when you have children. There is a short window of time when I can plop the baby into her high-chair or pack-n-play, give her a snack or a toy, and she will be content— I give it 20-30 minutes max. I started looking for shortcuts to try to maximize my time in the kitchen with the least amount of stress possible.
A lot of these are ideas I got from Pinterest. LOVE, love, LooooVE my Pinterest!
- Make-ahead and freeze! This has become one of my favorite things to do while my baby naps since I have some kind of daytime insomnia and can’t sleep! Yesterday morning, I put together a batch of loaded breakfast burritos to microwave and send with my husband every morning for the next week. It was a little time consuming, but totally worth it! Don’t want to cook full-blown meals just to store away in the freezer? Why not make some sides? One thing I like to do is take some veggies or fruits that are on the verge of going bad, steam or bake them however I want and then freeze. I love steaming some baby carrots and then portion them out to give to Hayden for a healthy snack she won’t choke on ;) It never fails that I buy a bag of potatoes and never get through an entire bag before they go bad. So what I started doing was taking half the bag, dice, steam, separate into sandwich baggies, then freeze. I don’t season them at all until I take them out to cook them. That way, I can season them however I want to fit my meal— butter potatoes, garlic potatoes, or country-fried potatoes! Rice is another one. Keith likes regular steamed rice and never eats the entire thing, so I always freeze what is left then take it out the next time he wants some or I can make some veggie-fried rice for me & the baby! See what I mean?
- FREEZE EVERYTHING! Freezing is nothing new. I didn’t INVENT anything here. But it is something I never valued until I had a family and started cooking a lot more and having to stretch dollars… and food. I never realized just how much food I was throwing away! I have started freezing almost everything. Leftover lasagna, taco meat (I always make so much so this is perfect!), pasta, spaghetti sauce (another one I make a ton of everytime!), cooked veggies and fruits, soup, pot roast, etc. Also, if I buy one of those extremely large packs of chicken breasts, I will portion them out in two’s and ziploc them together then freeze. Only need 1/4 cup of canned “whatever”?? Freeze the rest!! You’ll be surprised how that comes in handy!
- Crockpot, crockpot, crockpot. It doesn’t get much simpler than that, folks. Pot roast, sloppy joes, chicken breasts (they come out so unbelievably tender it’s amazing.), pork loin, whole chicken (another huge $$-saver! Need I say it? Cook then freeze! You’ll have so much chicken already cooked and ready to use!), ribs, etc. You just pour everything in, set the timer, and let it work it’s magic. Then defrost whatever side you choose to go with it and boom. Dinner!
- Find uses for the little stuff… hate all those broken pieces of potato chips at the bottom of the Sour Cream & Onion bag? Wouldn’t that make an awesome breading for some baked chicken? What if you mixed together some cream of chicken soup & sour cream, coat the chicken, then cover in those potato chip crumbs? Sounds fantastic, right? Yes it does. I’ve never tried it because I just now came up with it. But I did save those pesky crumbs and now I know what to do with them! ;)
Finding ways to save money isn’t just for poor people. Even if it’s not money you care to save, think of how much longer between grocery shopping trips there would be! Who wouldn’t like that?
I hope these few little tips have gave you some good ideas. If not, well you just know everything then don’t you?! Juuuuuust kidding. hahaha
Until next time,
xoxo,
Sleepless in Los Angeles (yes, again…)
A little about Mars & Venus
There is a “fight” that my husband and I have from time to time in which there is never a solution to. I put “fight” in quotations because I consider a fight to be harsh words, yelling, fist-throwing, etc. This is more of a little “bicker” or whathaveyou. Anyways, I’m sure it it one that many couples face as well. This is how it went this morning.
*Frustrated and annoyed because I’ve had a stiff neck for two days, it hurts to look down or up, and I’m trying to change the baby’s diaper while she is fighting to turn over while I’m trying to do so and my husband is sitting on the other side of the room in the recliner playing his video game* Keith says to me “Why are you so angry today?” and I quickly snap back “Because my neck hurts and Hayden is ruthless at diaper changes!” His reply “Why are you yelling at me?”
Now any woman would know that I was not yelling “at” my husband, I was just irritated at a number of things going on and my emotions did not allow me to respond in a calm manner.
What exactly happened there? No, men, it’s not that time of the month— why do they blame everything on that???
I expected my husband to mysteriously read my mind and offer to change the baby’s diaper even though he had no clue it needed changing or that to what extent my neck hurt. Big mistake to assume. And because I assumed he knew everything going on in my head, it caused me to snap when asked why I was so “angry.” Girls, I cannot stress this enough. Never. Assume. Anything. This ain’t the movies. Sure, it’s wonderfully fantastic when they offer things without us asking, but don’t ever assume. Had I just asked “Honey, could you please change Hayden’s diaper? My neck is killing me.” the whole thing could’ve been avoided.
This same similar “bicker” also happens quite often with the roles reversed as so:
*Keith comes home from a long day at work, puts stuff down, greets me and Hayden and then sits down in his chair and begins to watch TV.*
Me: How was your day?
Keith: Fine.
Me: Just fine? What happened?
Keith: I don’t want to talk about it.
Me: Why not? Are you mad at me?
Keith: No, Tasha, It’s just been a rough day and I just don’t want to talk right now. Just drop it.
Me: Jeez, you don’t have to be so mean. *With hurt feelings leave the room*
Me: How was your day?
Keith: Fine.
Me: Just fine? What happened?
Keith: I don’t want to talk about it.
Me: Why not? Are you mad at me?
Keith: No, Tasha, It’s just been a rough day and I just don’t want to talk right now. Just drop it.
Me: Jeez, you don’t have to be so mean. *With hurt feelings leave the room*
See now in this scenario I had taken what should’ve been read as my husband was obviously tired and let him have his space to wind down but instead I turned it into a bigger, personal issue. Now there will be some cold shoulder, a couple snarky comments from me to him, and ending with him telling me what happened at work and that he wasn’t being “mean” he just needed quiet time.
Sound familiar, ladies (or men)?
In the book “Women are from Mars, Men are from Venus” one of the best lines I read went like this “Martians (men) go into their cave to be alone and quiet and to relieve stress however they want. Venusians (women) do not follow them into their cave or they will be burned by the dragon.” Women, if you have ever been in the situation like the one I played out in my above scenario, you know what the “dragon” is. If you are completely lost and you’re thinking the “dragon” is a penis reference.. well.. you’re absolutely right and can press CTRL+F4 to claim your prize.
The quote above has been extremely helpful and pretty much sums up many, many, MANY of mine and my husband’s bickers throughout the years. However, it is very difficult to follow through with. Obviously since it keeps happening.
The quote above has been extremely helpful and pretty much sums up many, many, MANY of mine and my husband’s bickers throughout the years. However, it is very difficult to follow through with. Obviously since it keeps happening.
Here are two things that were made perfectly clear in the very beginning of the Mars & Venus book:
WOMEN- We like to talk and vent about our problems. We are not looking for solutions. We want someone to say “Oh, yeah, totally. Mhm. That sucks. Shoooot.” etc…
MEN- They like to fix the problem so that it’s done and we’ll shut up and stop blabbering, because let’s face it, theeeeey dooooon’t caaaaare. So when we are wanting to vent and they keep offering us solutions (like “WELL WHY DON’T YOU JUST QUIT YOUR JOB THEN?”) and we just keep shooting them down they get frustrated and take it personal. Then it becomes a fight between the two.
Hence why women call upon eachother to vent. Because I know that I can call my girlfriend and they’ll be all “OH NO SHE DI-IDN’T!” Instead of “Well why don’t you just stop talking to her?”….ummm because what’s the fun in that? Right, girls? ;)
MEN- They like to fix the problem so that it’s done and we’ll shut up and stop blabbering, because let’s face it, theeeeey dooooon’t caaaaare. So when we are wanting to vent and they keep offering us solutions (like “WELL WHY DON’T YOU JUST QUIT YOUR JOB THEN?”) and we just keep shooting them down they get frustrated and take it personal. Then it becomes a fight between the two.
Hence why women call upon eachother to vent. Because I know that I can call my girlfriend and they’ll be all “OH NO SHE DI-IDN’T!” Instead of “Well why don’t you just stop talking to her?”….ummm because what’s the fun in that? Right, girls? ;)
These are just a couple things that I read and have tried to apply to real life as much as possible. However, it is extremely hard because these reactions just come to us naturally. Once put into enough practice, though, hopefully one day these little bickerings will be few and farther and farther between.
Bottom line, ladies (assuming men lost interest and stopped reading a loooong time ago), never assume anything and if you need to vent, call another female. We’re always interested in other peoples’ drama ;)
I’d say this was a nice little escape from my usual baby-blogs. But what can I say? She’s slept through the night two nights in a row *happy mama dance*
xoxo,
Still sleepy in Los Angeles
My Saturday
Hayden only woke up twice last night! SCORE! haha
So, today is quite busy for us. My husband has duty so he works overnight tonight (8am-8am) Booooo! Hayden and I took him in to work this morning so that we can attend my friend’s little girl’s birthday party. Keith’s duty days are about one in every four days. Those are the days that I usually try to get my laundry and other tedious tasks done.
I honestly don’t know what I would do if I had two kids. I’m so exhausted by noon every day taking care of housework and ONE kid, I can’t imagine two.
I got up at 6:30 and went downstairs to make my husband’s breakfast, lunch, dinner and put the coffee on. Got Hayden up at 6:45, went downstairs and made our coffees to go and got everything ready to walk out the door at 7.
Got back home at about 8:15, cooked breakfast for Hayden and myself and ate at 8:30. Sat down at 9am to make a list of things I need and need to do for Hayden’s 1st Birthday party while she played and watched her shows. Put a load of laundry in and then took Hayden upstairs, nursed, then put her down for her daily 9:30 nap.
Sat down here to ramble on about my daily nothings and it feels great. *takes long sip of coffee* Aaaaaah.
Now I have to go downstairs to get the dog off the table since he has got into a bad habit of jumping up onto the table to check for breakfast scraps and leaving himself stranded because he is afraid to jump down. Moron dog. I leave him for a good while before going to get him. Then I will shower and get myself ready for this party. When we get back it’ll be naptime. I’m thinking when she wakes I might take her to an early dinner at Olive Garden (since I love it and the hubby hates it… and we have a Gift Card) then maybe go see a movie… as long as my chores are done ;)
It’ll be a busy one but it’s just another day in the life I love!
I hope everyone’s weekends started off well. Have a great one.
xoxo,
Sleepless in Los Angeles
10 Truths about Parenthood
I come to you, once again, running on probably 4 hours of solid sleep with bouts of 20 minute intervals here and there. Hayden is just shy of 10-1/2 months old and is one of the world’s worst teethers. Don’t try giving me advice either because we’ve done it all.
For those of you who don’t know, my daughter is what pediatricians call a “High-Needs Baby” and if you don’t know what that is, you can read about ithere. If you read this and think, “OMG. This is (enter kid’s name here)!!” then I feel for you. While people who have never had a HNB before may look at you like you’re overdramatic about your baby’s behavior, I understand. As do many other parents. You might not have them near you, but they are there. Hit up some mommy boards with a post about your HNB and I guarantee it’ll make you feel more at ease.
It is so funny to hear some of my child-less friends talk about how things will be when they have kids. Hahahahahahahahaha…. sorry, just thought of a couple I’ve heard.
The truth is, friends…. well… I’ll list a few of the Brutal Truths that you will realize once you decide to finally take the leap and reproduce.
#1. YOU WILL NOT LOOK THE SAME….. NEVER EVER EVER NEVER EVER. Let me tell you, I had an amazing pregnancy. I wore mostly pre-pregnancy clothes the entire time. I gained 17lb. total and even had Gestational Diabetes. I worked out at the gym about 3-4 times a week and walked… a lot. I even worked out a lot after the baby was born. I was back into my pre-preggo clothes within 2 weeks of having the baby. BUT… That cute little flat stomach some of you have will NOT just “SNAP” back like some of you think it will. I don’t care what you’ve been told. Your boobs will nice and plump and big while pregnant… enjoy this. Breastfeeding moms, you feel me here. They will sag. Your nipples will get massive and if they are still pointing straight after months and months (sometimes years) of nursing consider yourself lucky. Formula parents, I have no idea what your boobs look like after having the baby, but I imagine they just go back to normal. Nevertheless, I breastfed (even knowing the change it would bring about) because it’s the best for my child and there are so many benefits for me as well.
#2. Stretchmarks do not fade. I was lucky enough to only get a few very light stretchmarks on the very bottom of my belly and under my boobs. Even as light as they are they have not gone away. Nor have they faded. I feel for the moms whose bellies looked like road maps from their pregnancies. “Use cocoa butter! Use __(name of super-expensive name brand lotion)___!—blah blah blah. Did it all. If you come out stretchmark free, good for you. I suggest lotioning as much as you can, but the truth is that your skin is stretching to house a human and you can only do so much. Stretchmarks just come with the territory.
#3. “Me and the hubby take turns at night.” This will only last so long, honey. Especially if you are a SAHM like me. We took turns too in the very beginning and then he went back to work after two weeks of leave. He still helps A LOT. But when your husband (or wife in some cases) has to get up at the crack of dawn to go hunt down the bacon, there is only so much you can depend on them for.
#4. “Sleep when the baby sleeps.” When you have a newborn and they are sleeping 18 hours a day, this isn’t so tough. But when they get older and their naps become at most 2 hours long it’s not so easy to do.
#5. Your house will be messy… very messy… And that’s OKAY!! People tend to think “You’re here all day. How is your house this messy?” to which I say “Because shut up! That’s why!”
#6. Those crazy healthy diets you have might have to change. When/IF breastfeeding, some babies are sensitive to certain things. Crazy organic, protein-powder packed, “clean” diets will cause your baby some major tummy troubles and it’s not pretty. You might just have to eat like a real person for a little while.
#7. You get used to not showering.
#8. You learn to eat very fast and wherever you have to so your body doesn’t shut down.
#9. Your baby will sometimes become a fashion accessory.
#10. People will think you are best friends because you both have kids. This requires parental assessment. Look at how they look, act, speak, and how their child looks, acts, and speaks. Then determine whether further friendship is deemed appropriate.
While bursting out the seems with truth I hope this made you think, laugh, maybe even cry (if you’re psycho). I say all of these things in complete love and adoration for my daughter, my husband, friends, and family. Being a parent is a wonderful gift that so many men & women wish for and sometimes are never able to achieve. I am blessed to have what I do. Never take my words as otherwise :)
xoxo,
Sleepless in Los Angeles
My New Year's Resolutions for 2013
- Posture — Since I have had Hayden my posture has got worse and worse it seems the older and HEAVIER she gets. Now it is to the point where I can touch the center of my spine and it is sore and never goes away. My husband showed me some good exercises to strengthen my back and improve my posture. Then he told me a good rule of thumb “Every time you walk through a door way, pop up.”
- Myself — I think next to “lose weight” this is probably the most popular. It is so hard to do when you have a child because your life becomes fully centered on them and you easily lose sight of yourself. So, this year I am going to start putting more effort into everything; from the way I dress to my hair to my fingernails & toenails to shaving my legs more ;) My hubby can vouch for that one… I have not yet and I refuse to let myself fall into the typical “mom” look. I’m getting MILF-mode into full gear. hahaha (that’s a joke… for the most part.)
- Get my boobies back — Breastfeeding. While it is the #1 best nourishment you can give your child for the first year, after the first year they no longer NEED it. It’s solely for comfort after that. With that being said, I plan to be finished with breastfeeding shortly after my daughter turns one year old in March. My boobs have pretty much been off limits since I had the baby so I’m sure my husband will appreciate this resolution as well. (If you said “EW! Gross!” to that. You’ll understand one day… and grow up! ha!)
- Not get pregnant — Fight the baby fever! I must remember what having a newborn was like PLUS having to deal with the handful I already have! My sister-in-law will be having her baby in April. I can get it all out then!
- Go on a family trip — Just the 3 of us. To anywhere we’ve never been (or at least anywhere I’ve ever been. Keith has been way more places than I have!)
These are my fun resolutions. There are, of course, the staple resolutions such as paying of debt, saving money, work out more, etc. that everyone has but those pretty much go without saying.
I hope everyone has a wonderful fantastic New Years Eve and let’s bring it in right! That means try to not drink too much champagne, pass out, and miss the ball drop ;) oooh the memories…
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
xoxo,
Sleepless in Los Angeles
Sleepless in Los Angeles
Wine-ing down from a long, napless day..
Today was very exhausting. The baby’s morning nap was only an hour long and I tried to get her to sleep a little longer by laying down with her in my bed and that didn’t work.. so we got up and had lunch, went on a walk, swings, the usual. Afternoon nap was the same way which sucked because I hadn’t been able to rest all day. Her hour-long nap is barely long enough for me to lay down, let alone actually fall asleep and feel rested when I wake up.
I forgot to mention my hubby had to work an overnight tonight.. that means he went in at 6am and will be home at like 8am tomorrow. So that’s why it was even more exhausting than normal. At least when he comes home from his normal workday at 4pm it breaks up the monotony a bit and I get a break.
Tonight, she was sitting in my lap and we were watching Baby First TV (HER FAVORITE!) and I saw her chewing on her fingers. So I put my finger in there to feel around for any teeth. I wasn’t expecting to feel anything since there hadn’t been any progress in the past few days and I felt two finally trying to surface on the top. I guess her teeth like to come in in two’s. That’s how her bottom teeth did. The pediatrician said the top teeth are a lot more painful than the bottom. Poor baby.
So that explains a lot of what happened last night and her crazy wakefulness lately. Like the bottom teeth, once they finally pop through everything will go back to normal— well for the most part.. nothing is ever “normal” when you have a baby ;)
The hubs promised me a pedicure after payday so I am really looking forward to that! Tomorrow I’ll post my totally awesome New Year’s Resolutions so stay tuned.
“Goodnight, sleep tight, and pleasant dreams to you. Here’s a wish and a prayer that every dream comes true. And now till we meet again.. Adios! Au revoir! Auf wiedersehen! Goodnight!” —This was the song my parents used to sing to me every night after they tucked me in :) It’s worth looking up if you’ve never heard it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ol9_0schMHs
xoxo,
Sleepless in Los Angeles
Sleepless in Los Angeles
Baby Rant-- Middle-of-the-night Temper Tantrums/BFing for Life?
So it’s 7am and instead of trying to catch a few more Zz’s before the baby wakes up, I decided to come in here and rant about my night last night… why? Because that’s what I do. I drink coffee and force myself to stay awake just to get a few minutes of time to myself before I have to kick Mommy-mode into full gear.
My daughter (almost 10 months old) started having middle-of-the-night temper tantrums a couple months ago. My guess is separation anxiety? I really don’t know. They talked about it in my “What to Expect the First Year” book but it doesn’t help one bit when it is actually happening. They tell you when you’re trying to train a baby to sleep through the night “don’t pick up the baby. whatever you do. don’t pick her up.” but then at 3am when she has been crying for over an hour and you go in, pat her on the back and tell her “it’s okay.” (even though she can’t hear you because she’s screaming at the top of her lungs “Mamamamamaaaa”) then walk out again and repeat 20 minutes later…. “AIN’T NOBODY GOT TIME FO’ DAT!!” So I end up going in, picking her up (instantly shutting the brat up), nursing her, and putting her back down. Most of the time this works… there have been times where as I’m putting her back into her crib she awakes and it starts all over again.
This has been a nightmare for me. How will I ever wean this child from breastfeeding if it is the only thing that settles her down in the middle of the night?
I am proud of myself for breastfeeding this long, but I’m so ready to be done with it. When she turns one year I’ll be ready to hand her a sippy cup of whole milk and tell her to have at it, Mommy’s kitchen is CLOSED! Unfortunately, last night has really made me think that this may be more difficult than planned.
That’s a whole different rant, though. I thought this “MOTN Tantrum” phase had subsided, so I told my mom on the phone yesterday “Hayden has been doing so great! She stopped waking up having temper tantrums!”…..so as my dumb luck would have it, last night happened. When will I learn to keep my mouth shut? Sheesh.
Okay, SO. Today I am starting a new plan. If I want this baby to be completely weaned from me by the time she is one year I have got to end this “walking set of boobs” view she has of me. No more whipping them out whenever she crawls to me whining. And as for the MOTN Tantrums…. well hopefully last night was the end of that. If not, we might have to put her crib in a room non-adjacent to ours… for the sake of mine & my husband’s sanity.
I’ll let you know how this all goes.
Until next time,
xoxo,
Sleepless in Los Angeles
xoxo,
Sleepless in Los Angeles
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